| Abba Eban | History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives. |
| Abraham Lincoln | You cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they could and should do for themselves. |
| Addison | An indiscreet man is more hurtful than an ill-natured one; for as the latter will only attack his enemies, and those he wishes ill to, the other injures indifferently both his friends and foes. |
| Aeschylus | Delay not to seize the hour! |
| Agatha Christie | Every woman should marry an archaeologist because she grows increasingly attractive to him as she grows increasingly to resemble a ruin. |
| Al Bundy | Pretty women make us buy beer. Ugly women make us drink beer. |
| Albert Einstein | A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new. |
| Albert Einstein | Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler |
| Albert Einstein | Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world, and all there ever will be to know and understand. |
| Albert Einstein | Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed. |
| Albert Einstein | Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity. |
| Albert Einstein | There are two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle. |
| Albert Einstein | Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe. |
| Anais Nin | I postpone death by living, by suffering, by error, by risking, by giving, by losing. |
| Anon | Later never exists. |
| Anon | Remember, people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold - but so does a hard-boiled egg. |
| Anon | Some people dream of success... while others wake up and work hard at it. |
| Anon | Take risks: if you win, you will be happy; if you lose, you will be wise. |
| Anon | The best way to get something done is to begin. |
| Anon | You cannot always have happiness, but you can always give happiness. |
| Anon | The best way to predict your future is to create it. |
| Anon | A successful man is one who can earn more money than his wife can possibly spend. A successful woman is one who can find that man. |
| Anon | Life isn't about the number of breaths we take, but the moments that take our breath away. |
| Anon | Minds are like parachutes. They only function when they are open. |
| Anon | Never trust a thin chef. |
| Aristophanes | Wise people, even though all laws were abolished, would still lead the same life. |
| Aristotle | He who cannot be a good follower cannot be a good leader. |
| Arrianus | When men are doubtful of the true state of things, their wishes lead them to believe in what is most agreeable. |
| Artur Rubenstein | I have found that if you love life, life will love you back. |
| Basil S. Walsh | If you don't know where you are going, how can you expect to get there? |
| Ben Stein | The indispensable first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: decide what you want. |
| Benjamin Disraeli | Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness without action. |
| Benjamin Franklin | Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. |
| Benjamin Mays | The tragedy of life doesn't lie in not reaching your goal. The tragedy lies in having no goal to reach. |
| Bertrand Russell | To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom. |
| Bill Bryson | We used to build civilizations. Now we build shopping malls. |
| Bill Shankly | If you are first you are first. If you are second you are nothing. |
| Bill Shankly | Some people think football is a matter of life and death. I don't like that attitude. I can assure them it is much more serious than that. |
| Bob Hope | A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it. |
| Bob Marley | Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our minds! |
| Bob Monkhouse | Personally, I don't think there's intelligent life on other planets. Why should other planets be any different from this one? |
| Bobby McFerrin | Here is a little song I wrote, You might want to sing it note for note, Don't worry be happy. In every life we have some trouble, When you worry you make it double, Don't worry, be happy...... |
| Brian Koslow | The most common cause of insufficient results is insufficient action. |
| Buddha | To keep the body in good health is a duty... otherwise we shall not be able to keep our mind strong and clear |
| Buddhist Proverb | If we are facing in the right direction, all we have to do is keep on walking. |
| Calvin Coolidge | Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence and determination. |
| Cato The Elder | Wise men learn more from fools than fools from the wise. |
| Charles Baudelaire | Nothing can be done except little by little. |
| Charles M. Schwab | A man can succeed at almost anything for which he has unlimited enthusiasm. |
| Charles O. Finley | Sweat plus sacrifice equals success. |
| Chinese proverb | Let every man sweep the snow from before his own doors, and not busy himself about the frost on his neighbour's tiles. |
| Chinese proverb | The fame of good men's actions seldom goes beyond their own doors, but their evil deeds are carried a thousand miles' distance. |
| Chinese proverb | The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials. |
| Christopher Morley | There are three ingredients to the good life; learning, earning, and yearning. |
| Col. Michael Friedsman | Concentrate on finding your goal, then concentrate on reaching it. |
| Coleridge | Human experience, like the stern-lights of a ship at sea, illumines only the path which we have passed over. |
| Colette | What a wonderful life I've had! I only wish I'd realised it sooner. |
| Danish Proverb | Life is not holding a good hand. Life is playing a poor hand well. |
| Danny Kaye | Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can. |
| Dave Edison | I am desperately trying to figure out why Kamikaze pilots wore helmets. |
| David Guy Powers | Each day is a new life. Seize it. Live it. |
| David Hume | The most unhappy of all men is he who believes himself to be so. |
| David Sarnoff | A life that hasn't a definite plan is likely to become driftwood. |
| Dean Martin | You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. |
| Dhammapada | The fool who knows his foolishness is wise so far, at least; but a fool who thinks himself wise, he is called a fool indeed. |
| Diana Jordan | Men are simple things. They can survive a whole weekend with only three things: beer, boxer shorts and batteries for the remote control. |
| Doug Larson | The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball. |
| Douglas Everett | There are some people who live in a dream world, and there are some who face reality; and then there are those who turn one into the other. |
| Dr Seuss | When you are in Love you can't fall asleep because reality is better than your dreams. |
| Earl Nightingale | Don't let the fear of the time it will take to accomplish something stand in the way of your doing it. The time will pass anyway; we might just as well put that passing time to the best possible use. |
| Edgar Wallace | An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex. |
| Elayne Boosler | When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. |
| Elbert Hubbard | Don't take life too seriously; you'll never get out of it alive. |
| Elbert Hubbard | Everything comes too late for those who only wait. |
| Elbert Hubbard | To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing. |
| Eleanor Roosevelt | The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. |
| Emo Philips | I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper. |
| Epictetus | First say to yourself what you would be, and then do what you have to do. |
| Eric Morecambe | My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden. |
| Ernest Hemingway | Never confuse movement with action. |
| Errol Flynn | Any man who has $10,000 left when he dies is a failure. |
| Firdaus | The man who talketh much and never acteth will not be held in reputation by anyone. |
| Francis Bacon | A wise man will make more opportunities than he finds. |
| Francois De La Rochefoucauld | As it is the characteristic of great wits to say much in few words, so small wits seem to have the gift of speaking much and saying nothing. |
| Francois Duc de La Rochefoucauld | The strongest symptom of wisdom in man is his being sensible of his own follies. |
| Francois Duc de La Rochefoucauld | Wisdom is to the mind what health is to the body. |
| Frank Lloyd Wright | The longer I live the more beautiful life becomes. |
| Fred Dehner | The best helping hand that you will ever receive is the one at the end of your own arm. |
| Friedrich Nietzsche | The best weapon against an enemy is another enemy. |
| Galileo Galilei | I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use. |
| George Bernard Shaw | Alcohol is a very necessary article ... It makes life bearable to millions of people who could not endure their existence if they were quite sober. It enables Parliament to do things at eleven at night that no sane person would do at eleven in the morning. |
| George Bernard Shaw | When I was young, I observed that nine out of ten things I did were failures. So I did ten times more work. |
| George Bernard Shaw | Which painting in the National Gallery would I save if there was a fire? The one nearest the door of course. |
| George Bernard Shaw | Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. |
| Gloria Pitzer | About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age. |
| Gloria Steinem | Dying seems less sad than having lived too little. |
| Goethe | Divide and rule, a sound motto. Unite and lead, a better one. |
| Goethe | Many people take no care of their money till they come nearly to the end of it, and others do just the same with their time. |
| Goethe | We in reality only know when we doubt a little. With knowledge comes doubt. |
| Goethe | We would rather confess our moral errors, faults, and crimes than our ignorance. |
| Goldoni | This world is a beautiful book, but of little use to him who cannot read it. |
| Gordon Sinclair | If women were meant to play football, God would have put their tits somewhere else. |
| Harry S. Truman | It's a recession when your neighbour loses his job; it's a depression when you lose yours. |
| Henny Youngman | When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. |
| Henri de Lubac | Habit and routine have an unbelievable power to waste and destroy. |
| Henry Ford | Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal. |
| Henry Miller | Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation... the other eight are unimportant. |
| Henry Youngman | If at first you don't succeed... So much for skydiving. |
| Herman Melville | It is better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation. |
| Homer Simpson | Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else - and it hasn't - it's that girls should stick to girls' sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such. |
| Homer Simpson | Old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use. |
| Homer Simpson | Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose... it's how drunk you get. |
| Hugh Sidey | Joy in one's heart and some laughter on one's lips is a sign that the person down deep has a pretty good grasp of life. |
| Ilie Nastase | I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife. |
| Indian Proverb | When you were born, you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life in such a manner that when you die the world cries and you rejoice. |
| Irish Proverb | Everyone is wise until he speaks. |
| Isaac Asimov | Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome. |
| James A. Michener | If you reject the food, ignore the customs, fear the religion and avoid the people, you might better stay at home. |
| James Dean | Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die tomorrow. |
| James Gordon, M.D. | It's not that some people have willpower and some don't. It's that some people are ready to change and others are not. |
| Janet E. Stuart | Do not wait for ideal circumstances, nor the best opportunities; they will never come. |
| Jean Anouilh | To say yes, you have to sweat and roll up your sleeves and plunge both hands into life up to the elbows. It is easy to say no. |
| Jean Cocteau | We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don't like. |
| Jean Paul Getty | My formula for success is rise early, work late, and strike oil. |
| Jean-Jacques Rousseau | Happiness: a good bank account, a good cook and a good digestion. |
| Jeannette Rankin | You can no more win a war than you can win an earthquake. |
| Jeffrey Bernard | One way to stop a runaway horse is to bet on him. |
| Jimmy Lyons | Tomorrow is the only day in the year that appeals to a lazy man. |
| John F. Kennedy | Mankind must put an end to war, or war will put an end to mankind. |
| John F. Kennedy | Once you say you are going to settle for second, that's what happens to you. |
| John Lennon | Life is what happens when you are making other plans. |
| John Powell | The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing. |
| John Wicker | Opportunities multiply as they are seized; they die when neglected. Life is a long line of opportunities. |
| Jonathan Winters | If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it. |
| Josef Stalin | A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic. |
| Jules Renard | As I grow to understand life less and less, I learn to live it more and more. |
| Kamran Hamid | Fate is for those too weak to determine their own destiny. |
| Karl Marx | Last words are for fools who haven't said enough. |
| Katharine Hepburn | If you always do what interests you, at least one person is pleased. |
| Ken Dodd | Honolulu - it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother. |
| Kin Hubbard | No-one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish. |
| Larry McMurtry | If you wait, all that happens is that you get older. |
| Laurence J. Peter | There's only one thing more painful than learning from experience, and that is not learning from experience. |
| Lillian Dickson | Life is like a coin. You can spend it any way you wish, but you only spend it once. |
| Lilly Langtry | Anyone who limits her vision to memories of yesterday is already dead. |
| Logan Pearsall Smith | There are two things to aim at in life: first, to get what you want; and after that, to enjoy it. Only the wisest of mankind achieve the second. |
| Lois Platford | You have all eternity to be cautious in when you're dead. |
| Lucimar Santos de Lima | It doesn't hurt to be optimistic. You can always cry later. |
| M?gha | The foolish undertake a trifling act, and soon desist, discouraged; wise men engage in mighty works, and persevere. |
| Machiavelli | Men are of three different capacities: one understands intuitively; another understands so far as it is explained; and a third understands neither of himself nor by explanation. The first is excellent, the second, commendable, and the third, altogether useless. |
| Mae West | Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before. |
| Mae West | Everything's in the mind. That's where it all starts. Knowing what you want is the first step toward getting it. |
| Mae West | Sex is like bridge; if you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand. |
| Mae West | You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. |
| Mahatma Gandhi | Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes. |
| Mahatma Gandhi | The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. |
| Marcus Aurelius | The wise man sees in the misfortune of others what he should avoid. |
| Margaret Lindsey | This very moment is a seed from which the flowers of tomorrow's happiness grow. |
| Margaret Mead | Never believe that a few caring people can't change the world. For, indeed, that's all who ever have. |
| Margaret Thatcher | I don't mind how much my Ministers talk, so long as they do what I say. |
| Margaret Thatcher | Standing in the middle of the road is very dangerous; you get knocked down by the traffic from both sides. |
| Margaret Thatcher | To wear your heart on your sleeve isn't a very good plan; you should wear it inside, where it functions best. |
| Marie Beynon Ray | No one grows old by living, only by losing interest in living. |
| Marie Corelli | I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night. |
| Mario Andretti | If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough. |
| Mark Twain | A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain. |
| Mark Twain | A lie can run around the world six times while the truth is still trying to put on its pants. |
| Mark Twain | Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. |
| Mark Twain | Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. |
| Mark Twain | It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog. |
| Mark Twain | Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great. |
| Mark Twain | October. This is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks in. The others are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August, and February. |
| Mark Twain | The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up. |
| Mark Twain | There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist. |
| Mark Twain | Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. |
| Mark Twain | When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years. |
| Michel Eyquem De Montaigne | We can be knowledgeable with other men's knowledge, but we cannot be wise with other men's wisdom. |
| Michelangelo Buonarroti | The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark. |
| Mignon McLaughlin | For the happiest life, days should be rigorously planned, nights left open to chance. |
| Miles Davis | I'm always thinking about creating. My future starts when I wake up every morning. Every day I find something creative to do with my life. |
| Miss Piggy | Never eat more than you can lift. |
| Mitch Hedberg | Alcoholism is the only disease that you can get yelled at for having. |
| Nadine Stair | If I had my life to live over again, I'd dare to make more mistakes the next time. |
| Naguib Mahfouz | You can tell whether a man is clever by his answers. You can tell whether a man is wise by his questions. |
| Napoleon | If you want a thing done well, do it yourself. |
| Nicolas-Sebastien Chamfort | The most wasted of all days is that on which one has not laughed. |
| Nicole Hollander | Can you imagine a world without men? No crime and lots of happy fat women. |
| Norman Douglas | Why always, 'not yet?' Do flowers in spring say, 'not yet?' |
| Oliver Wendell Holmes | We do not quit playing because we grow old, we grow old because we quit playing. |
| Orison Swett Marden | All men who have achieved great things have been great dreamers. |
| Oscar Wilde | Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much. |
| Oscar Wilde | Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. |
| Patrick Moore | At my age I do what Mark Twain did. I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page and if I'm not there I carry on as usual. |
| Patrick Murray | I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't. |
| Paul Ehrlich | To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer. |
| Peter O'Toole | When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself. |
| Pierre Corneille | To conquer without risk is to triumph without glory. |
| Plato | Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something. |
| Plutarch | Poverty is not dishonourable in itself, but only when it arises from idleness, intemperance, extravagance, and folly. |
| Pythagoras | The most momentous thing in human life is the art of winning the soul to good or evil. |
| Rabbi Ben Azai | In seeking wisdom thou art wise; in imagining that thou hast attained it, thou art a fool. |
| Ralph Bus | Children really brighten up a household - they never turn the lights off. |
| Ralph Charell | Avoid the crowd. Do your own thinking independently. Be the chess player, not the chess piece. |
| Ralph Waldo Emerson | Write it on your heart that every day is the best day of the year. |
| Raymond Blanc | When you cook it should be an act of love. To put a frozen bag in the microwave for your child is an act of hate. |
| Red Smith | Dying is no big deal. The least of us will manage that. Living is the trick. |
| Richard Bach | Here is the test to find whether your mission on Earth is finished: if you're alive, it isn't. |
| Robert Anthony | Most people would rather be certain they're miserable, than risk being happy. |
| Robert Brault | Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things. |
| Robert Paul | A woman knows she's wearing the right dress, when her man wants to take it off. |
| Rollo May | If you do not express your own original ideas, if you do not listen to your own being, you will have betrayed yourself. |
| Ruth Gordon | Courage is very important. Like a muscle, it is strengthened by use. |
| Saint Augustine | Patience is the companion of wisdom. |
| Sam Ewing | Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all. |
| Samuel Johnson | It is a most mortifying reflection for a man to consider what he has done, compared to what he might have done. |
| Scottish Proverb | Be happy while you're living, for you're a long time dead. |
| Seneca | One should count each day a separate life. |
| Sharon Stone | Woman might be able to fake orgasms. But man can fake whole relationships. |
| Shira Tehrani | You can't do anything about the length of your life, but you can do something about its width and depth. |
| Simonides | A man cannot possess anything that is better than a good wife, or anything that is worse than a bad one. |
| Sir Thomas Foxwell Buxton | With ordinary talent and extraordinary perseverance, all things are attainable. |
| Sir Thos. Overbury | The man who has not anything to boast of but his illustrious ancestors is like a potato - the only good parts belonging to him are underground. |
| Socrates | The Delphic oracle said I was the wisest of all the Greeks. It is because I alone, of all the Greeks, know that I know nothing. |
| Socrates | The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing. |
| Socrates | Wisdom begins in wonder. |
| Sophocles | Much wisdom often goes with fewest words. |
| Source Unknown | Wise men are not always silent, but they know when to be. |
| Spike Milligan | Money can't buy you friends but you do egt a better class of enemy |
| Steven Wright | If one synchronised swimmer drowns, do all the rest have to drown too? |
| Sue Murphy | Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives. |
| Swedish proverb | Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow. |
| Sydney Smith | A great deal of talent is lost to the world for want of a little courage. Every day sends to their graves obscure men whose timidity prevented them from making a first effort. |
| Talmud | All the blessings of a household come through the wife, therefore should her husband honour her. |
| Talmud | Nothing is more becoming a man than silence. It is not the preaching but the practice which ought to be considered as the more important. A profusion of words is sure to lead to error. |
| Talmud | The best conduct a man can adopt is that which gains him the esteem of others without depriving him of his own. |
| Talmud | Who is a wise man? He who learns of all men. |
| Telugu | If your foot slips, you may recover your balance, but if your tongue slips, you cannot recall your words. |
| The Dalai Lama | Spend some time alone every day. |
| Theodore N. Vail | Real difficulties can be overcome, it is only the imaginary ones that are unconquerable. |
| Theophrastus | Time is the most valuable thing a man can spend. |
| Thomas Carlyle | Give me a man who sings at his work. |
| Thomas Jefferson | I like the dreams of the future better than the history of the past. |
| Thomas La Mance | Life is what happens to us while we are making other plans. |
| Thomas Lovell Beddoes | If there were dreams to sell, what would you buy? |
| Tieck | Whoever brings cheerfulness to his work, and is ever active, dashes through the world's labours. |
| Tillotson | A more glorious victory cannot be gained over another man than this, that when the injury began on his part the kindness should begin on ours. |
| Voltaire | A witty saying proves nothing. |
| Walter Matthau | My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more. |
| Warren B. Bennis | You are your own raw material. When you know what you consist of and what you want to make of it, then you can invent yourself. |
| Wieland | It is an old observation that wise men grow usually wiser as they grow older, and fools more foolish. |
| Will Kommen | If you look like your passport photo, you're too ill to travel. |
| Will Rogers | Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there. |
| William Feather | Conditions are never just right. People who delay action until all factors are favorable do nothing. |
| William James | Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the fact. |
| Wilson Mizner | Be nice to people on your way up because you'll meet 'em on your way down. |
| Winston Churchill | I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. |
| Winston Churchill | If you're going through hell, keep going. |
| Winston Churchill | It has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried. |
| Woody Allen | Is sex dirty? Only if it's done right. |
| Woody Allen | Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's a pretty good empty experience. |
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